Today I was reading over a post at the seduction chronicles, and spotted an interesting statement that, while I do have a criticism for him, I believe is in many ways is altogether true.
That pick-up is a path of humility. While true in many ways, I believe the term “humility” must be clarified extensively to be of use.
In the past, I might have believed that having humility meant not standing up for yourself, and being filled with self-doubt. In other words, having humility meant, at one time to me, literally listening to, obeying, and taking people on their word on their beliefs. This is a self-crippling type of “humility.” I won’t elaborate on how this was tied to my religious beliefs — I’ll leave that to the imagination.
That is not what true, effective humility is.
And now I bust an admittedly large quote from Seduction Chronicles Post:
Critiquing yourself constantly and having to come to the realization that your pathetic with women is definitely not something you like to write in your journal. When things go wrong with with a woman you have to look at yourself and figure out what you did wrong. Sometimes it’s not your fault, but considering you’re coming from a place of scarcity, it probably is. This can be humiliating.
Humility should include the realizing of your starting conditions and being willing to fail because of your limited experience. This is not embracing failure, it’s realizing that despite your meager place — you’re rocking it. You’re being brave. Humility is the realization that because you’ve had so little success there, that you should not be EXPECT to perform like Style or Mystery in the same situation.
I have the strong belief that you are literally not responsible for your past, but are instead, only responsible for your future. (If this means writing a few thank you, and I’m sorry for that shit I did to you notes… Fine) All of your past personality was molded and shaped by the experiences and people you were exposed to. If you were raised around a bunch of “AFC’s” you shouldn’t be angry at yourself for having put so little effort into changing in the past, but you should reinforce the fact that you must push yourself harder and harder to overcome your fears in the future.
Be glad for the tiny successes. When you get blown out, be glad for the fact that you walked up and approach the set. Be glad for those little goals. If you’ve never had a girlfriend, don’t think you’re expected to go out and “F close” that night at the bar. If you’re about to go to start a serious workout program for the first time in your life, please don’t go to the gym and try to benchpress 300lbs… and if you do, and survive, don’t be mad that you didn’t quite make it. Be glad you entered the gym, you formerly lazy bastard.
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My definition of humility is “the ability to be taught”. Nice elaboration on my post.